Friday, July 13, 2012

Sea Sick

Spent my morning at the dentist office waiting to hear that I needed to floss more, brush better and buy the latest and greatest toothbrush.  

Meeting with the dentist was surprisingly painless and he seemed to be pleased with my habits.  As I made my way into the next room for a regular cleaning, I had no idea what I was in for.  The hygienist sat with me first and was genuinely interested in what I did for a living.  She continued to ask questions as she slowly laid my chair back and put on her mask.  She adjusted my chair a few times...up, up, down.  Up. Down, down. Perfect.

She proceeded to ask me questions.  Not the yes or no kind.  Very detailed questions about succulents, climate change and politics.  Each time she finished a thought, she'd adjust my seat slightly.

At first, it seemed normal.  Adjusting for better reach perhaps.  But as she continued to tell me our planet was in for a whirlwind of change, she fell into a pattern of sorts.

Do you like the green agave or the slate?  If I had 30 seconds with Obama, I'd tell him we need to spend money on greenhouses.
Up. Up.
Down, down.
Scrape, scrape.
Down.
I hate social media.  They shouldn't call it social, they should call it segment media.
If you were just on the road, did you see all the crazy climate changes?  Which city was the worst?
Scrape, spray, suck.  Scrape, scrape.
Up, up.
Down.

I was slightly annoyed at first.  But as I continued to go up and down, it was comical and took my mind off the scraping.  It actually became a game for me to guess when she'd move me again and how long it would be before I laughed.